Monday, 26 August 2013
I feel somewhat like a clockwork automaton mother most mornings. A bleary eyed robot dressed in crumpled pyjamas packing lunchboxes and tidying breakfast dishes and reminding little boys of all they need to do so that we can get out the door on time. I wasn't sure how we were going to add a baby to the mix and still get to school before the bell. But we have - most of the time. And I have the loving arms of my eight year old to thank for that. He scoops up his little sister and hops onto the bed with her while I pull on my clothes and brush my teeth, passing her back to me to pop into the sling for the walk to school. The love they already have for each other is written all over their faces.
This morning I am home alone for the first time since Thea was born, while Grant walks the kids to school. It only happens once a year, when his school has an extra day off for the boarders to head home for the weekend. And I could think of no better place to be than back in bed; which is where I intend to stay until they get home again.
Four months in and the early mornings and broken nights are catching up with me - exhaustion creeping its way back into my bones. I have been waiting for this deep tiredness to arrive after drifting through the first few months on a high of happy birth hormones. And like clockwork, here it is. As my hair drops out and the shadows reappear under my eyes I remind myself to slow down and rest when I can. I nurture myself with quiet days at home, warm baths and cups of tea in the morning sunshine. And we count down the days until spring holidays are here.